© you're so funny!

thanks ! omw from school, i jumped out of the moving van because, i thought we stopped. embarrassing. i did not get hurt but my fren started to bawl.

thanks ! tata’s nano used to be my favorite car ever. its so cute, you cannot change my mind.

thanks ! a car ran over my 4 year old self because, my frens had challenged me by saying ‘you cannot cross the road without help.’ guess what? i proved their point. my parents know nothing about this episode.

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thanks ! i am the way i am because my dad accidentally banged my head against the wall when i was 3, while playing with me.

thanks ! i am disgustingly self aware, there's nothing i haven't already over-thought about.

thanks ! my ex best friend stopped talking to me after i opened up something very personal to her. she was forcing me to tell, so i did. and she said ‘i can't stay frens with someone who has gone through that ew.’ OKAY.

How did China invent gunpowder but it was the European nations that went out and “conquered the world using firearms”?

thanks ! i almost got k!dnapp3d last year.

side note : this is a slight trauma dump and heavy silly shit, so don't come at me ty.

thanks ! my mum made me visit a psychologist when i was 5 because, she thought i was crazy for liking movies with violence. question mark question mark.

Why was the rock band Kiss so successful?

thanks ! i almost fell from a 9 storey building while playing holi with my friends, in grade 6. idk who saved me but i remember getting pushed in a bucket of colored water after that.

thanks ! i once punched a guy in grade 6, and one of his teeth disappeared. we're still in touch and he has a denture, thank you.

thanks ! i once turned so red after an awkward situation, that my teacher took me to the medical room, to check if i had fever.

I’m 26 years old and a married woman. My husband hates my flat chest. What is the permanent solution?

thanks ! got chased by a group of seniors in grade 7, because we threw water balloons on their vehicles. valid because we did that on purpose.

thanks ! i yap fast, i eat fast, i walk fast. i walk really fast, i hate slow walkers.

thanks ! i kicked a guy who was three years senior to me, in the balls while playing kabaddi in the school playground because, he made fun of my hg for not having a father. deserved.

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thanks ! the lore i carry, are the things that actually happened to me. my parents n know nothing about whatever i wrote here except, where i have mentioned them. i have no plans on telling anything to them, any time soon. thank you.

thanks ! it's still a mystery that, why i haven't broken any bones, considering the way i live.

thanks ! i have a useless talent of memorizing and recognising footsteps. if i am meeting someone for the first time and i hear their footsteps, i’ll know what their steps sound like when i meet them, next.

Why am I so afraid that gun owners have set traps to kill me outside my house or my car?

thanks ! i once got sent back home because the receptionist thought i was in grade 8. i was in grade 11, thank you.